The Secret Of Happiness

Be.

Here.

Now.

No, seriously – that’s it.

If all you did was slow down, be present and stop living every moment in anticipation of being somewhere else, your so-called problems will melt away and you’ll be MUCH happier.

Let go of thinking, obsessing and all the ‘what if’s’.

Release all your goals and concerns for the future and instead replace them with the power of this instant and enjoying it to the fullest extent.

Learn to accept things as they unfold in your life – surrender to ‘what is’ and not what you think it ‘should’ be.

That applies to your spouse, the president, your boss, your kids, your financial status, etc…  As hard as this may sound, surrendering to the present moment and allowing things to unfold as they do will literally change your life immediately.

There are no lacks or shortages in your life.  You may think there are – but in reality, things are what they are.  It’s YOU who can’t accept that which causes never-ending stress.  Simplify your life by accepting EVERYTHING as it is.  Anything that may seem to be missing in your life is really only an illusion.  Learn to have contentment with ‘what is’ and you’ll begin to have a completely stress-free existence.

Look back on your life and on all the so-called problems you’ve had at one point or time.  First off, you probably can’t remember 90% of the things you used to drive yourself nuts worrying about.  And second, things always seem to work themselves out over time – they always have and always will.  You don’t need another ‘thing’ to make you happy – all you really need is right here and now because right here and now is all you’ll ever really have.

DAILY ACTION:  Catch yourself when you find yourself not in the moment or striving to be somewhere else.  Bring yourself back to the present.

You Can’t Escape Your Final Destination

 

There is only one destination that we will all ultimately end up at.

No one can escape that fact.

That said, so many of us end up living a life of regret – spending our lives looking over our shoulders in fear of losing something that we will ultimately surrender upon death anyways.

Many of us spend our lives blindly following rules, ideas or norms that were put it front of us by others even though they never really resonated with us.

Many of us spend our time on this planet defending our precious little ego – getting upset whenever that ego is threatened.

That’s a shame simply because it doesn’t have to be that way!

Life is the best video game we could ever play.  And just like the greatest video game, it’s set up to have challenges to make it fun to play.

I remember when I’d get the cheat code for invincibility in a Nintendo game and then I’d breeze right through it.  Well guess what, the game became pretty fucking boring once I had that code!

Life has challenges and rewards worthy of our greatest efforts. So game on!

Stop taking things so seriously and getting so stressed out.  So you had a fight with your boss at work? Okay.  So you and your spouse are arguing about something? Okay.  Your dog got run over by car?  I know – it sucks.  But remember, it’s ALL part of the ultimate video game and you have to treat it like that.

You will go through challenges and setbacks but that is how the video game is set up – those who win will keep playing and push through challenges (while expecting them to occur) until they ultimately win!

DAILY ACTION:  Constantly remind yourself that you are an avatar in the greatest video game ever – expect challenges along the way, know anything worthwhile is never easy… and have an absolute blast playing the game! 

Choosing To Be Negative Is Always The Wrong Choice

How many people do you know that do nothing but complain?

Hell, you may be one of them without even knowing you’re doing it!

Some people simply have a negative outlook on life… or maybe they’re just always expecting bad things to happen. These are the ones who say “well, with my luck…” or “must be nice for so and so but that would never happen to me”…

Another form of negativity is trying to think up all the bad shit that could happen in all facets of your life… so that you’re somehow more prepared for it if it does.

Pretty sweet way to live your life!

Always remember that no amount of feeling bad or being negative will ever create a good result.

Never.

I’ve struggled with my fair share of negative thoughts throughout the years. Even outwardly high-achievers can fixate on the 1% that they feel is “wrong” with their life instead of focusing on the 99% that’s great.

I was the type that always would obsess over what was going to go wrong in business matters so that I could somehow prepare for it. And I remember my attorney once said to me on a real estate deal that no matter the million things you think of that could go wrong that you try and prevent from happening, chances are 99.9% of the time, they’ll never happen… and if something bad does happen, it will be something that wasn’t even on your radar.

That stuck with me.

All these negative thoughts and planning for every variation of “what if” events was basically all for naught and did nothing but create a ton of unnecessary stress.

I’ve since learned that it takes the same level of effort to be positive as it takes to be negative!

And that’s what those that live the Optimized You follow.

We only have so much bandwidth between our ears. So they realize that it makes absolutely no sense to ever expect anything negative out of life.

Play that out. Even if you’re positive about the outcome of an event and the outcome ends up not being what you were hoping for, you STILL were better off being positive along the way instead of negative!

That doesn’t mean you should be irresponsible and not have a Plan B if your Plan A doesn’t work out… but having a Plan B in place and then moving forward with Plan A with positivity is much different than obsessing over every detail that might make your Plan A fail… and what if your Plan B doesn’t work either – we should probably put together a Plan C through Plan ZZ today as well!

What a ton of wasted mental energy.  You will never, ever be able to think of all the bad things that ‘could’ happen.

One strategy those that live the Optimized You follow is to never, ever believe a prediction about the future that you tell yourself that doesn’t empower you.

I know for myself, keeping that top of consciousness allows me to snap out of negative thought patterns when they arise (because they will) – and go back to expecting positive outcomes, thinking positive thoughts and making positive comments.

And once you start eliminating negativity from your life, magical things seem to start happening.

You’re happier at home, at work, with your kids, etc… and good shit just seems to start flowing into your life.

Give it a whirl.

DAIlY ACTION: Always choose to be positive in your thoughts, actions and predictions about the future. It never pays to be anything else.

Stop Chasing In Order To Get What You Want

Treat what you want like a butterfly.  You chase it and it will fly away from you.  You stop giving it so much attention and it will fly up to you and sit on your shoulder.

Why is it that the super hot girl in high school always went for the guy who paid her no attention… while the guy who constantly bought her flowers, built a shrine in his bedroom and wrote her poems every day never got a shot with her?

Well, other than the fact that the shrine was probably a tad bit overboard, the real reason why he never landed his dream girl is the same reason why many of us never achieve our goals – “the more we chase something, the faster it moves away from us

I remember taking a sales training course early on in my career and they taught us about treating sales as a pendulum.  And it’s essentially the same concept – the more you push at someone, the more they are turned off and view you as the pestering ‘salesman’.

But when you pull away a bit and act as if you don’t “need” the business, the more they come running after you and want to work with you.

I remember it feeling odd when trying it… but being surprised by how well it worked.

Whenever I would do the traditional salesman dance and press the customer on why they should buy my product, go over all the features and benefits and do the typical dog and pony show, they would get defensive and immediately feel like they were being sold something.

But when I took the approach of ‘look, maybe this isn’t something you should do…’ they would immediately tell me “no, no, no — it’s not that at all.  This definitely is something I want to do – I just need to understand more about XYZ first before I buy”.

So, moral of the story, if you really want something, treat it like a butterfly.  It may sound paradoxical but the more you are chasing it, the more it eludes you.  But if you turn your attention to other things, it’ll come and sit on your shoulder.

DAILY ACTION:  Think of yourself as a magnet and begin to let things flow TO you instead of you chasing after them.